this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize