I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize
