Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
