Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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