I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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