Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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