i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
