ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize