Soap is not a condiment
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
