Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
