Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
