I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Hippo gnu deer
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize