Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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