Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
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