so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
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And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
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Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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