So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
