chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
