Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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