Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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