So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
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