apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
