I wanna passion pit in your ass
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
