But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
