thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Pants are for mortals
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
