I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
He shit in the fireplace
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
