I wannas sexs uuuuu
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
love makes seman taste better
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Randomize
