Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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