would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Terrible idea I love it
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
