Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
