That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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