I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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