I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
