Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related