i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
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