I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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