Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
me + whiskey = a bad person
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Randomize
