Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize