All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
