Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
