saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
You had me at "let me see your balls"
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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