I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
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he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
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I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.