Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
There's always time for handjobs
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
This is the high leading the old right now
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!