so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize