Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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