I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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