i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
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