one two three fourrrrnication!
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
