I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize