Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I will pee on everything he values.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
