You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Randomize
