That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
