OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Randomize
